I’M SO GLAD SOMEONE THOUGHT OF ME IN THIS TIME OF DJAKSDJFSJGFSJDGDF

the people who set up that photoshoot are doing their jobs Very Right

(also thank you!!!! i’m honoured to have a precious blog)

hey, it’s cool. so there’s two sex scenes, both in a tent. both times dean and cas are frotting/rubbing face-to-face, kissing and cuddling. both scenes are semi-graphic (enough to warrant an NC-17 label). neither dean nor cas is distinctly “in control”, either time.

the first time (at night), they mutually initiate doing the do. cas is lying on top, and they pause in the middle for cas to reveal he’s an angel, and then talk about the state of the world. cas’ wings pop out during the big finale.

the second time (in the morning), dean’s on top (he initiates and guides them through it, but again, neither is distinctly in control - it’s just a mutual touchy-feely funtime).

later on in the story, cas mentions that he was nervous the first time, and although dean could’ve overwhelmed him, he let cas “lead” - as in, dean lay on his back, went at cas’ pace, and asked before doing things.

there’s no penetration, no domination, no kinky stuff (besides “whoa!!! you have wings omg”), no pet names, or language meant to belittle or demean either dean or cas, in either scene.

i hope that explains things!!

–

fic link: The Wireless (58k DCBB - a fluffy romantic solarpunk adventure!!! cas is a radio show host and dean is accidentally a prophet)

(about this)

rabbits won the poll, except I started writing and immediately had a health crash, and in order to get any writing done at all, I had to work on something else. I got that finished, but then had to edit my DCBB instead. so “Operation Garlick Bred” is currently abandoned until further notice. i’m very sorry about that

BUT there’s a story with dogs coming soon! hopefully in October

(a few months ago an anon asked when my next animal-related story will be, and I promised right after my DCBB. the abandoned rabbit fic was meant to be that. but the dog one will be that instead. hopefully everyone’s okay with this)

https://spnpositivityproject.tumblr.com/

cool! no posts yet

just this under the “etc.” tab: a safe space to spread positivity in the fandom. send a message about a blog or blogger you love and we’ll post it!

and this under the rules:

• include the blog’s url typed correctly
• say ONLY positive and nice things about the blog/blogger; entries with negative comments will not be posted
• make sure you’re using the correct pronouns of the person you wish to compliment
• don’t send comments that could make someone uncomfortable
• all entries will be COMPLETELY ANONYMOUS
• if you want people to know you sent a specific compliment or comment please say so in the ask
• remember we are trying to spread positivity and happiness to the spn fandom
• if you received a nice compliment it’d be nice to leave one for someone else, but it’s not required

i await something marvellous on that blank page~

it would be a very painful marriage, what with all this aching we’re doing D:

(about this)

i’ve never been to university/college so i’m no expert, but i’m pretty sure 80% of the class probably feels that way, or has done in the past. but heck!! you made it to college, and you being there is proof you’re worthy of being there. make the most of it, okay? i recommend trying to make friends, if you can <3

protip: best way to make friends in a room of strangers: wear fandom merch. or do something really weird that’s potentially embarrassing, but without shame??

(pretty much all my best and dearest friends have been gained by someone being like HEY I LIKE/DO THIS WEIRD THING A LOT LET’S TALK ABOUT IT. or… y’know, just going up to someone with a nice face and saying hi. “i like your hair/shirt/shoes/tattoo” works 9 out of 10 times to make someone smile. honestly, if you’re awkward af and have no idea how to conduct a conversation, just own it. it doesn’t scare as many people away as you’d think. i punched myself in the face once and knocked my glasses off, and we both left that conversation smiling. also i met one my irl best friends, and then the rest of my friend group by spinning in circles at the back of the gym.)

+ i should probably mention: you don’t even need to be ~super smart~ to get through college, you just need to work hard. so work hard. <3 i firmly believe that everyone is equally intelligent but just has different potential strengths, each fed by practise and hearty application. you have great strengths, somewhere in you c:

(apologies if this isn’t helpful idk. i wish you good luck regardless!!!)

*coos*

“There are good things in this world, and I’m glad you are one of them.”

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i need a poetry book from you, stat

–

ALSO these were in my inbox but i forgot to reply to them !!

Anonymous said: (23 days ago) Good things anon here: hun, I’ve left a bunch of messages for you as of the past few weeks, but not all of them were me. You have a few other people leaving good vibes for you too. We see your worth. We enjoy your art. We appreciate you.

Anonymous said: (23 days ago) Close your eyes. Take a breath. Relax your shoulders. Good things exist. Cats, sunsets, so many kinds of pasta, fanfiction, comfy sweaters, the soft roar of rain on a window, cookies, scented candles, star wars movies, pens that glide just right over paper, houseplants. All good things. Have a good day.

<3 <3 <3

thank you for looking out for me

on the subject of houseplants, i got three new plant friends the other day!!

the big one is a Calenthea Mamba Pink (who had a small mealybug infestation that has been dealt with), the other one beside it is a snake plant (who has perked up since this photo was taken), and the lil guy on the floor is an elephant bush, which is the plant elephants like to eat, and apparently grows several feet high.

plants are very good things and i recommend them to everyone. but maybe not from the hardware store, unless adopting sad plants and cheering them up is a hobby of yours (apparently it’s one of mine now)

what was your message was about?

most likely i got it and didn’t reply yet (apologies)

anon? i love you. whoever you are, i think about your messages when i feel like crap. you got me through the day a few days ago. i want you to know that you are appreciated and your kindness is having a very real effect on my life. thank you.

Anonymous said: It’s okay. It’s okay to feel bad. It’s okay to have pain. It’s okay just to be. It’s okay. Life can’t be planned the way we want it to. It’s okay. You are still worth being here. You are still loved.

it seems i have a friendly neighbourhood therapist looking out for me <3

i don’t know what prompted you to send these, but they are appreciated regardless

(thankfully right now i’m in a good place mentally, and haven’t had a spiteful message for quite some time~)

THANK YOU!! 

who are you?? how did you know?? regardless, THANK <3

–

last night, for the first time in my life i had an “oh no i’m getting older” dream. i think i was part of the cast of ‘friends’, and GOT OLDER and underwent character development. and i woke up like “oh no i’m in season 1 of friends and i don’t know what season 7 looks like for me”

being 24 feels Proper Adult whereas 23 felt like Advanced Post-Teen. gotta figure out what i’m doinnnggg

(what i want to do: be supported on patreon so i can write whatever, whenever, forever. hint hint click the link pls and thank u!!!! yes i’m talking to YOU, random scrolling person who reads and enjoys my fics, not other people who are not you!!! mentioning this for birthday reasons)

anyway yes those were my thoughts today. also my tumblr queue is empty and i’m TOO TIRED to fill it right now so apologies. my blog’s been all over the place recently because a) my dash is everything all the time, and b) i’ve spent every single day either writing or vegetating ‘cause i’m still sick and blehblehblbh every so often. i messed up my comfortably nocturnal sleep pattern and now i’m awake in daylight and i’m not sleeping well (how do people sleep in the dark, idfk. i sleep too deeply and wake up too soon)

i did have an excellent day today, anon! it was the first birthday i’ve had in maybe 10 years where i wasn’t too sick to function. i was concious enough to have conversations and stuff, so that was cool. mostly just played a game called ‘bubble witch 3 saga’ though. (if you like bubble shooter games, it’s a 10/10 app imo. it’s cute, addictive, and doesn’t pester you to buy stuff all the time, or with ads. perfectly playable without throwing money at it. do recommend. also it’s witch/fairy themed. THE LIL MAGIC CATS I LOVE I LOOOOVE ;A;)

ksfjdkj i digress THANK YOU ANON i really appreciate this message!! and thanks for providing an excuse for me to blog-blog or whatever this was

the end. as you were, friends

[about this 4.6k essay about my life + Destiel that I wrote for @destielfanfic​ back in 2013]

my dear anon, i really really REALLY APPRECIATE this!! i love that you understand! i love that you went digging for that and found it! i love that you messaged me about it!! thank youuu <3

i hope i can always do what i was doing in 2013, and am still doing now: turning everything bad into something good, and sharing it with someone who gets it. today, you are that someone, so congratulations.

also, since i re-read that essay, i find it ironic that even within the essay, i say “i don’t know why i’m sick, and i still don’t know”, it said earlier “we ate a lot of toast” and turns out, toast is literally the problem. toast made me sick for years, and i’m still suffering because of toast poisoning. freaking celiac disease, man. the answer was under our noses all along 

also? i hope whatever you went through, or are going through, becomes less of a hassle to cope with or recover from. i’m rootin’ for you, anon~

–

my fics (2 million words of me turning bad things into beautiful things~!!)

my patreon (the place where crowdfunding helps me keep making the things)