imagine if when benny is at his lowest point and desperately trying to stop himself from attacking someone, and he can’t call dean because dean’s cut him off, when he’s panicking and suffering with irrepressible bloodlust and trying to cling to anything, anything at all, that might help him
he ends up mimicking dean all those times in purgatory and praying to cas
not expecting the angel to show up or anything just as an attempt to stave off the murder instinct by pretending someone, anyone, cares about him not being a monster
but then cas appears, tired and pale and shaken but there, because as little as cas liked benny - benny was dean’s friend, benny saved dean, and benny saved cas too, and if cas isn’t good enough to save angels then he can at least try to save the monsters who want to be good.
#he flies into blood banks to get blood for him #physically holds him down with angel strength when the kill instinct almost overtakes him #and just having him around helps benny focus on being better #and equally #benny gives cas someone to talk to #he doesn’t need to be afraid of hurting him because heaven has no interest in a vampire #he can even talk to benny about his strange memory blanks and confusing thoughts and visions #because what does he care about a vampire’s opinion of him?#he doesn’t need to be afraid of judgement because what moral high ground can a vampire have #and the simple fact of having someone to help; someone who takes his mind off himself and his own crushing guilt #and having a visible positive effect on someone - even if it is a vampire - helps cas get through the days #and by the time benny feels stable enough to last on his own #they have their own sort of friendship#admittedly still based mostly in snarky comments and taking 0 shit but now with a respect flowing underneath
#god this is all i want from life #cas to get friends outside of dean #and for every relationship he has #he acts differently #i wanted to see him be protective older brother for samandriel #and wide eyed fan of some wise monk #and snarky but understanding friend to benny #and fatherly to some little kid he rescues from the streets
